“Road House” (2024) Review – A Dumb Punch to the Brain

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“Road House” Plot Summary

Amazon Prime Video’s “Road House” remake takes the plot and none of the heart from the original ‘80s cult classic. Director Doug Liman and screenwriters Anthony Bagarozzi and Charles Mondry make a 2-hour Budlight commercial with plenty of music, fights, and Jake Gyllenhaal’s abs, but refuse to make any of it mean something. The result of “Road House” is a movie that feels strangely dated and robotic at the same time.

The plot of “Road House” moves so fast in the first 10 minutes that it may give you whiplash. Frankie (Jessica Williams) visits an underground boxing match in search of a new security guard for her bar. She sees how no one wants to fight Dalton (Jake Gyllenhaal), and despite not seeing him fight, she offers him a job at her roadhouse in the Florida Keys. Dalton gets stabbed, tries to take his own life, is almost hit by a train, and then decides, y’know what? He’ll take the offer. And we’re off.

People at the Road House are kind to Dalton, and he immediately establishes himself as a force to be reckoned with when a gang of thugs come to cause trouble. For all the muscles and jock bullying in “Road House,” the fights have an awkward amount of CGI in them. These thugs happen to be hired by Ben (Billy Magnussen), a rich man whose father owns a huge chunk of their town and who also wants to take over Frankie’s road house. Ben is cartoonishly villainous and sees no choice but to hire an even more over-the-top bad guy (Conor McGregor) to stop Dalton. Dalton may be bonding with the locals and getting flirty with Ellie (Daniela Melchior), but his secretive past may be even more threatening than the thugs who want to wreak havoc on the roadhouse.

“Roadhouse” knows it’s a dumb action movie, but the jokes fall flat and the action falls flat. Despite Jake Gyllenhaal’s physical transformation, his stoic performance especially feels hollow and tonally contrasts with what the dialogue requires. The movie even seems to forget about the Roadhouse and focuses more on a bad revenge plot and goofy CGI sequences in the last hour. The only people who will enjoy “Roadhouse” are those who can get a concussion after watching it.

Content Information

“Road House” is rated R due to cursing throughout, violence (including fights, broken bones, and blood), drug use (smoking and drinking), and sexual content (including nudity).

Other Noteworthy Information

1. The original “Road House,” starring Patrick Swayze, came out in 1989. Patrick Swayze and Jake Gyllenhaal worked together on “Donnie Darko.”

“Road House” General Information

Character Descriptions

Please Note: This character guide is not an exhaustive list of every cast member, and character descriptions may contain what can be considered spoilers.

Dalton (Jake Gyllenhaal)

Dalton is a drifter with a mysterious past. He lives inside his car and makes money in bareknuckle matches, but tries to find a peaceful solution before violence breaks out. He may have been successful in fighting in the past, but something resulted in him losing his career and finding his way to the roadhouse. He wants to keep that past from others.

• The actor is also known for their role in “Brokeback Mountain.”

Frankie (Jessica Williams)

Frankie is the owner and operator of the roadhouse. She’s the one who recruits Dalton to join them and wants to keep the Road House running as a sanctuary for people on their small island.

• The actor is also known for their role in “Shrinking.”

Ellie (Daniela Melchior)

Ellie is a local nurse who takes a liking to Dalton. She’s willing to open up to him and is accepting of his past.

• The actor is also known for their role in “The Suicide Squad.”

Ben (Billy Magnussen)

Ben is a rich bully who wants to demolish the Road House. He’s reckless, selfish, and his wealth and privilege know no bounds. He’s willing to do anything to get rid of the Road House.

• The actor is also known for their role in “Game Night.”

Knox (Conor McGregor)

Knox is a pure beast and takes joy in hurting others. He’s hired by Ben and Ben’s father to wreak havoc on the Road House and defeat Dalton.

• The actor is also known for their role in “UFC.”

Review

Our Rating: Negative (Acquired Taste)

Let us know your thoughts in the comments:

1.  What did you think of the new “Road House?” Was it dumb? Fun? Or dumb fun?

Low Points

“Road House” Feels Like A Constant Punch to Your Head

“Hey, are you guys open today?” a man asks as a truck is clearly rammed through the bar. This is only after the last 40 minutes, not including a mention of the bar. This is after Dalton is hired to be a bar bouncer after Frankie never sees him fight, and there is no explanation why Dalton decides to work there after rejecting the initial offer. There’s dumb fun, and then there’s dumb. “Road House” clunks into the latter category, with any emotional attachment to characters being an afterthought in the movie.

Bad Dialogue and Characters Make “Road House” Horribly Dated

Like the initial ‘80s movie, the characters in “Road House” all feel 30 years out of touch. They’re simple, without much space for nuance. While that’s the point, their dialogue ranges from groan-inducing jokes to yawning menaces. You’ll get more laughs at the attempts to be tough than you will at the actual humor in the movie.

On The Fence

CGI Action Gives a Bad Name to Action

For as much as Gyllenhaal and McGregor may have worked out for this movie, there’s something inherently comical about seeing CGI fists fly and punch. There’s a goofy car hit, a goofy explosion, and a goofy boat crash that all look more cartoonish than cool. While CGI may be safer and faster to develop in post-production, it takes away from the skill and danger a movie about a fighter is supposed to have.

Jake Gyllenhaal as Dalton

While I normally like Gyllenhaal, he feels woefully miscast in a role that’s meant to waver between a charming hero and an unruly psycho. Gyllenhaal is able to evoke the idea that Dalton has a haunted past, but he can’t seem to muster the charm or flashes of violence needed in the character. The strange part is that Gyllenhaal has been able to do this in past roles, but he speaks in monotone through Dalton, never raising the audience’s pulse.

Good If You Like

• Bad action movies

Recommendations

If you like this movie, we recommend:

1. Fast X
2. The Beekeeper
3. Southpaw

Check out our movies page for our latest movie reviews and recommendations.

“Road House” (2024) Review – A Dumb Punch to the Brain

Overall

“Roadhouse” knows it’s a dumb action movie, but the jokes fall flat and the action falls flat. The only people who will enjoy “Roadhouse” are those who can get a concussion after watching it. 

Highlights

Disputable

“Road House” Feels Like Constant Head Punches to Logic

Bad Dialogue and Characters Make “Road House” Horribly Dated

CGI Action Gives a Bad Name to Action

Jake Gyllenhaal as Dalton

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