In the follow up to Monday’s Red Table Talk, the ladies of the table reiterate the importance of communication alongside knowing thyself.
Addressing Willow’s Self Harm Comment
As can be seen by many a media outlet, the big surprise from Monday’s episode was Willow self-harming when she was 11 or 12 a little after her career hit a public high. Which led to the idea of Jada maybe being angry for not knowing, or things of that nature, which was quickly dismissed. After all, anger, as Willow states, would only end up pushing her further than bringing her back to herself.
Which, to follow up on how she snapped out of it, that was how. She got better at communication, became more in touch with who she truly is, and felt gratitude. Not just in terms of from people around her, but also in terms of from nature, music, and one thing which was a really strong statement was her saying, You got to protect yourself, even from yourself.
With it being mental health awareness month, and across a lot of Black media the push to stop the stigma being a focus, especially in terms of going to therapy, this episode couldn’t have come at a better time. But, let’s dig into Willow’s statement “You got to protect yourself, even from yourself.” Now, set aside she is a public figure with certain privileges and take note she is a human being. As she says, no matter who you are, or your circumstances, and Jada co-signs, you are going to hit a point where you are going to question yourself. Now, there are many ways to go forth from there.
Which is why protecting yourself, from yourself, is so important. You have a certain control over your thoughts and your environment, Maybe not absolute, but you have enough control to provide some sort of positive or negative influence. And, as Jada goes to say, though I’m paraphrasing a bit, while you may never get over certain things which happened to you, a loved one, or around you, you have to own your happiness. Not just in terms of accepting it but also finding it.
For when it came to Willow, who didn’t have the tools to communicate at the time, at least as she does now, she took to nature. From what we have seen, if you follow the Smith family, meditation, being in silence and checking in on you, got her back to herself. Since, with silencing outside negative energy, and calming the chaos of her own energy which was influx, perhaps that is what led to her, the way she put it, snapping out of it.
If just because, while she may not have had the ability to communicate at the time, her mother still gave her the tools to figure out a way to sustain herself. Be it through an abundance of love, gratitude for all things, or simply allowing her, as noted when Willow cut off all her hair, to explore what makes her happy and comfortable, and not Jada happy and comfortable.
Your Freedom & Your Joy: Jada, Adrienne
Addressing Jada saying she felt like a shell due to making everyone else happy and feeling empty, and for Ms. Adrienne, how her older sister’s death led her to find her joy, that one the main question asked of them. Something which, for Ms. Adrienne, for her, she takes note of Sondra because there was a time she wasn’t true to herself. She wasn’t spicy and tart, but always kind, but worried about living up to others expectations and their judgment. Something which was especially tough because a partner was involved and of course, the human need for love and perhaps validation causes disturbances between who you are, who they want you to be, and how to grow as a person – for yourself. So when her older sister died, that wake-up call led to her getting herself together and it got rid of the obstacle keeping her from evolving and being in tune with herself.
Now, as for Jada? One of the things she stresses in finding yourself and getting out of a lull is patience. That is alongside, taking some form of responsibility for yourself. Giving yourself the allowance and freedom to do so. Which she notes it takes time to cultivate. The journey, as shown when it came to making peace with Sheree, isn’t quick and surely isn’t easy.
Even in terms of coping with death, dealing with such is a journey. One in which, the journey may never end but you have to make sure you don’t just remember where the person left you. If even thinking about it in that way. The way Jada and Adrienne note it, with tables and areas dedicated to loved ones no longer with them, while they physical may no longer be with you, their memory and legacy remain alive. For with every conversation about them, they come back in spirit and, if you adhere to a certain faith or belief, they are always around when in need.
While shorter than the follow up to the blended family conversation, you have to appreciate how, in a relatively short turnaround, they address the news stories and elaborate more. Making it where, while one of the taglines might be leaving it all on the table, it’s more of a slogan than an absolute. For as shown by them being on vacation somewhere, the red table talk can be wherever it is needed.
For, as driven by every episode, conversation is key. Talking about how you feel, building a sense of community, keeping who got you this far alive through communication, that’s everything. That is part of the foundation of what makes life living and what could very well keep you alive. So no matter where or when, you gotta talk. For it may not just save your life but also someone else’s. Just be open and kind when doing so.
Collected Quote(s) & .Gifs
You got to protect yourself, even from yourself.
Previous Episode’s Recap
Jada Pinkett Smith, Willow Smith and Adrienne are back for a LIVE Q&A surrounding the impact of loss and how it varies for everyone. Ask them your questions and share your stories in the comments below.
Posted by Red Table Talk on Wednesday, May 16, 2018