Black Love returns for a fourth season, and we’re once again reminded of the beauty and diversity of Black love.
|Director(s)||Codie Elaine Oliver|
|Introduced This Episode|
|Herself||Deborah Joy Winans|
|Herself||Kristen Baker Bellamy|
|Herself||Tana M. Session|
This content contains pertinent spoilers.
It Started When We Were Young – Bill, Kristen, Glen, Yvette
For Bill and Kristen, like Glen and Yvette, it was college when things kicked off. Mind you, Glen didn’t go to Yvette’s college, but did DJ at a party and eventually got Yvette’s number. The point is, for this set, they started young. Which, for Glen and Yvette, did complicate things. Mainly due to Glen’s life not necessarily being on the same track and with Yvette being in college, getting her life together, it made Glen cool, but was he boyfriend material?
But, with them, we begin to understand how vital a vibe and being honest is. For example, Glen was broke, and it doesn’t seem he ever hid it. But he knew how to be consistent, give good conversation, and reassure any doubt she had.
Switching to Bill and Kristen, the thing for them seemed to be timing, for that matters as well. The two of them, for a long time, shared a circle but didn’t connect until the time was right. Back when he was calm and ready, and she could receive that. Because someone can be perfect, but until you are as perfect for them as you perceive they are perfect for you, things can’t be.
And Then There Was A Shift – Joy, Terrence, Tracci, Tony
For example, when it comes to Joy and Terrence, they started off as friends. There wasn’t this, I saw you, you saw me, romance movie type of thing going. Not to imply there wasn’t some flirting, and you know, just being homies, but you have to be ready, and that isn’t instant. For them, it took about 9 months and a long conversation that wasn’t even about getting together. That is what it took for them to realize they might be more than friends, and there was serious potential there.
As for Tracci and Tony? The shift for them came in the form of trust. Because, when you expect things to go bad, as Tracci said, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and for her, she was looking and only picking up minor things. Like what? Well, Tony being corny. Of all things, that was something she wanted to be a deal-breaker, but through her mother, something clicked. Because if being corny is one of the worst qualities you can find in a man, that’s a blessing.
There Were Moments I Wasn’t Sure What Could Happen, Until They Needed Me – Dana, Tana, Anthony, Melanie
So, let’s talk about the more dramatic couples. Better said, the couples who found their love tested in ways that made it seem, for a minute, maybe they were the one, but it was just bad timing. In terms of Anthony and Melanie, the bad timing came in the form of Anthony wanting to pursue the career he was passionate about and not setting that aside to be at home.
Which, just so we don’t set the wrong tone here, doesn’t mean he wanted to be out in the streets laying it low and spreading it wide. More so, he wanted to be a musician, and the opportunity to make it doesn’t come every day. So, for a bit, he pursued his dreams because if he didn’t, he’d become miserable, make Melanie miserable, and then there wouldn’t be anything to their relationship but arguing and an inability to reconcile.
So, the two were separated, and Melanie kept a sense of faith that they’d get back together. She even got a tattoo of his name on her ass so people would know who it belonged to. Which led to, in time, things flipping in their relationship, and rather than her uprooting her life and traveling to him, Anthony moving and changing to accommodate her life.
As for Dana and Tana? Well, like many, there was a whole life had before the couples we meet found each other. Both Tana and Dana had kids and exes, and Tana was separated when Dana became part of the picture. Which complicated things for with Tana having a young son and being very family-oriented, it makes dating complicated.
Specific to their situation, after her ex went off and did his thing in London, he wanted to come back, and so there was this conflict between what was there and going well, and trying to repair what was. However, after a car accident, Tana was shown that the ex wasn’t really for sickness and in health, yet Dana was. Leading to her making the decision that, as much as she’d love to be a family with the man she had a child with, this new man truly is living up to the weight of such a title. Both as a man, period, and her man.
Things To Note | Question(s) Left Unanswered
- Considering nearly every one of these people got a business you can Google, am I the only one who finds it weird last names are not included?
Collected Quote(s) & .Gifs
I didn’t just want a partner, I wanted a soul mate. I didn’t just want a relationship, I wanted bliss and if I couldn’t have that, I refused to settle for anything else.
The possibility of me was better than the absolute of her.
Good people aren’t found they flourish.
Anthony and Melanie & Dana & Tana
I know it isn’t right to romanticize or even dramatize a person’s journey, but when it comes to these four people? Oh, their stories sound like films. The kind you are so emotionally invested in you are yelling at the screen but also laughing at times. For example, Melanie and the whole tattoo on her ass thing? If you can’t imagine that scene in a romantic comedy, it just might not be your genre. Because as ridiculous as her friends, and surely some viewers, saw that, it reminds you how freeing, and wild love can make you, especially when you have faith attached to it.
Then with Dana and Tana, you got to get into one of the themes of the episode which is just timing. A lot of people don’t have the best timing in saying the right thing, doing the right thing, yet when you call, they will make a way to show up. And that’s always the biggest and more important thing – people making time for what’s important for them. Even when, like in the case of Glen, they only got a $5 gift card and time to give, not much else.
Yet, showing up, even when you know things aren’t going to be fun, as Dana did after Tana’s accident, it reminds you sickness and in health shouldn’t just be a vow you take on after there are nuptials. For essentially, marriage should just be a confirmation of what you already know. Not you suddenly deciding it is time to get serious just because there are legal documents and a bunch of people who came to a wedding. And it is through these two sets you really get an exclamation mark on how love can be challenging, but if you stay ready, it is worth it.
Understanding There Is Nothing Wrong About Love Being A Feeling, As Much As Being Logic
Piggybacking off that, a lot of people go back and forth over the value of love at first sight, or vibe, versus growing into it. As we all know, different things work for different people, and while some like Joy and Terrence needed time and Bill and Kristen needed to be at the right place at the right time, it doesn’t mean either had the best way to eventually be in a relationship. Sometimes, as shown by Dana and Tana, timing is going to suck, and you got to hope for the best.
Yet, at other times, it’s like Tracci and Tony where you see them, scope them out, and things fall into place. Unfortunately, there is no one size fits all, and you got to risk the worst happening to get the best result.
A Reminder That You Got To Be Ready For Good Times, Bad Times, And People Changing
One of the most consistent things talked about on Black Love is prepping, and knowing your partner will change. For whether it is their career shifting, people dying or having kids, there are moments when you lose or gain titles, finances change, amongst other life events, which change people. And despite how tough it might be, you got to learn how to and be willing to fall in love all over again. Because as cute as the vows are, there is a reason each line makes it clear that marriage won’t be easy, and the person you are dealing with on that day may not be the same when death parts you.
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