Collected Quotes for The Month: November 2016

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Best Of

[…] the natural inclination of adults is to devalue the dreams of kids who express an interest in pursuing the arts. Let a kid show any kind of special aptitude for math or science, and the world will move mountains to put him in programs that stimulate his gift. The same goes for children who express even a remote interest in subjects society thinks will lead them toward careers we all tend to consider exceptional: doctor, lawyer, professor, engineer, or if it’s the arts, a classical musician and the like. Hardly anyone ever encourages the child who can’t sit still, or who runs her mouth a little too much or who lets her imagination soar, to do what is perfectly natural and right to her: consider acting, singing, dancing, or otherwise make a living performing. […] it seems such a wasted opportunity, so incredibly unjust to steer a kid away from what makes his heart sing.
— “Chapter 3: Drama.” Around The Way Girl – Pages 47-48


When dad says, ‘You can call me anytime,’ that’s not bein’ a dad. That’s coppin’ out.
— “House of Healing: Fix A Black Man’s Heart – Part 2.” Iyanla: Fix My Life


I can give you a London accent, I can give you Becky the Valley Girl all day long. I can pull it back and get corporate when I need to, too. But checks are usually attached to that. I have to get paid to be that person. That is not who I am.
— “Chapter 2: Authentic.” Around The Way Girl – Page 40


I would remind you that you volunteered to be here. […] You volunteered to be here on this planet at this time in human history. You chose to be here so that you could unleash your gifts to make a mighty difference before you leave. So you didn’t come to complain and bemoan what is going on in the world. You came to be an answer to what’s happening on the planet.
“House of Healing: Fix A Black Man’s Heart – Part 3.” Iyanla: Fix My Life

You’re getting clean. This is what happens. The feelings you’ve been drowning in booze starting to come up all ugly and loud.
— “Who’s Dead?” How To Get Away With Murder


God gave man free will to see what he’d do with it. So why would you ever think praying and waiting would be all you needed to do for a blessing?
— Amari Sali


[…] what I look for in a friend: Loyalty and trust. The challenge to be a better me. The space to be unapologetically rough, rugged, and raw. I’m not biting my tongue around them, and while I know they won’t judge, I can trust them not to tell me what they think I want to hear. They work me, which I appreciate because it leaves the space for me to be me. This is important, because being fake with the ones I love isn’t an option – I’m not that girl. I get paid to pretend, but I won’t do it in my real-life relationships.
— “Chapter 12: My Squad.” Around the Way Girl – Page 221


“Only someone who has seen both sides can be certain of their convictions.“
— “Chapter 8 – Button.” – 3%


“I’m beginning to understand what I am. I am flawed, damaged. But the clarity I have gives me strength to do what you cannot. “

— “Season 2/ Episode 5.” Humans


[On Dying] It feels like all these beautiful pieces of life are flying around me and I’m trying to catch them. When my granddaughter falls asleep in my lap, I try to catch the feeling of her breathing against me. And when I make my son laugh, I try to catch the sound of him laughing. How it rolls up from his chest. But the pieces are moving faster now, and I can’t catch them all. I can feel them slipping through my fingertips and soon where there used to be my granddaughter breathing and my son laughing, there will be nothing. I know it feels like you have all the time in the world, but you don’t. So, stop playing it so cool. Catch the moments of your life, catch them while you’re young and quick. Because sooner than you know it, you’ll be old and slow. And there’ll be no more of them to catch.
— “Pilgrim Rick.” This Is Us


“It’s hard to know what to say […] because […] I don’t want to say anything now that I can’t take back later if you’re just gonna go home and make up. Because that makes me the asshole, like, forever.”

— “You Sold Me the Laundromat, Remember?” Shameless

The Rest

You’re so used to disappointing people, it doesn’t affect you anymore. But disappointing people and being an asshole are two different things.
— “Your Mama Had A Hard Night.” Good Behavior


[…] my afro wasn’t so much a hairstyle as it was a crown [and] my walk not so much one foot in front of the other as it was a strut.
— “Chapter 10: Building Characters.” Around the Way Girl – Page 182

[…] he would say exactly what was on his mind, with no thought about feelings or repercussions, and being that strong-willed often ran him into walls he couldn’t knock down.
— “Chapter 10: Building Characters.” Around the Way Girl – Page 183

[…] make it so they never, ever forget you, and then go claim what’s yours.
— “Chapter 11: On Being A Black Woman In Hollywood.” Around the Way Girl – Page 195

I’m over trying to find the ‘adorable’ way to state my opinion and still be likable! […] I don’t think I’ve ever worked for a man in charge who spent time contemplating what angle he should use to have his voice heard. […] It’s just heard.
— “Chapter 11: On Being A Black Woman In Hollywood.” Around the Way Girl – Page 192

Not everyone is going to have the look of, say, a Halle Berry, or the ethnic ambiguity of a Gugu Mbatha-Raw, and they shouldn’t, considering the diversity of black women. We are light as your white neighbor and as silky and chocolate as the Congo, thin enough to fit in that double zero and curvy enough to fill out a size twenty-two, stretched tall and really squat, too, with weave down our back and with hair so kinky it’ll break the teeth out of a strong comb. Some of us are sweeter than a Georgia peach and as quiet as a church mouse, and a gang of us are loud as we want to be and quick to verbally slit throats. And this is just a small sampling of us. There is no one way to present a black woman; we have a voice and we have the right not only to have that voice but also see it reflected back at us on the screen.
— “Chapter 11: On Being A Black Woman In Hollywood.” Around the Way Girl – Page 201

[…] cousins – blood by relations but friends deep in the heart.
— “Chapter 12: My Squad.” Around the Way Girl – Page 215

I’m […] great at maintaining friendships, but when their shelf life expires, [I] have no problem tossing those expired friendships in the trash where they belong.
— “Chapter 12: My Squad.” Around the Way Girl – Page 225

These days, when I date, a whole different set of rules comes into play. I’ve worked my ass off for all that I have, and if I open my world to a man, first and foremost, I have to make sure he means me no harm. Once I’ve deemed him safe, I have to deem whether the potential mate standing in front of me is bringing something more to the table. By ‘more’ I don’t mean material things. I don’t care what car he’s driving or how much he’s got in his bank account, or how many homes he owns. I have property. I have art. I have my own money. Instead, I’m checking for whether he’ll feed me spiritually – if he’ll take care of my mind and heart. I want a man who is consistent, who will respect me, who will honor me by giving me his quality time, who is fun and funny and willing to be goofy with me, but who can get serious when it’s time to work out our issues, without running away. I need my man to make me feel like he wants to be with me and that he’ll be incapable of seeing any other girl in the world, because he will be focused solely on me and what we’re building together. I need a man who will call me on my bullshit and not let me get away with it because I’m Taraji P. Henson, the star – a dude who will challenge me to be my better self. I need that guy.
— “Chapter 13: Grown Woman.” Around the Way Girl – Pages 241 to 242

She’s trying to provoke him and get something from him – his loyalty and trust. He doesn’t know how to give that, because, like her, he’s a kid stuck in a very adult situation, having to make adult decisions when he’s simply not ready to do so.
“Chapter 10: Building Characters.” Around the Way Girl – Page 181

You needed time, rest, healing. You didn’t ask for it. […] In a loving relationship where you expect to be honored and valued, you withheld information. That’s a secret, silent agreement, a lie. […] ‘I’m not gonna tell you my truth. I’m not gonna be authentic with you. I’m not gonna take care of myself. I’m not gonna allow myself to be supported and cared for. I’m not gonna allow myself to see what you really made of. I’m just gonna suffer through it’ and the horrification was when they didn’t give you back all that you thought you gave them.
— “House of Healing: Fix A Black Man’s Heart – Part 2.” Iyanla: Fix My Life


All that time, I thought you were fighting and not listening.
— “Chapter 4: Hustler.” Around The Way Girl – Page 87


We’re only beautiful online, people here don’t look at us the same way as people online do. Online you are championed for being different. People worldwide look at you, admire you because you can be this way [different], and pretty at the same time in a country where they can’t imagine people actually look like this.
— “Grace Neutral discovers the Brazilian girls leading the new beauty revolution” i-D


She was nobody to everybody, but I made her somebody to me.
— “Chapter 4: Hustler.” Around The Way Girl – Page 73


You like chasing, you don’t like having. The second you get what you want you figure out a way to throw it away.
— “Wear It.” Pitch


It sounds nice to know why you are getting up in the morning. You know, sometimes I open my eyes and I don’t know why I’m supposed to get out of bed.
— “Wear It.” Pitch


I apologize instead of being sorry.
— “House of Healing: Fix A Black Man’s Heart – Part 3.” Iyanla: Fix My Life


There’s a distinction between letting it go and beating yourself up because you do it.
“House of Healing: Fix A Black Man’s Heart – Part 3.” Iyanla: Fix My Life

Acting is communication, not only person to person, but soul to soul-a physical, emotional, and certainly spiritual expression.
“Chapter 9: Breathing Life Into Art.” Around The Way Girl – Page 171

I had the worst thought – I have to spend the rest of my life with myself.
— The Edge of Seventeen


Everyone in the world is as miserable and empty as I am. They are just better at pretending.
— The Edge of Seventeen


I can never forgive an action, but […] it says “we don’t wrestle against flesh and blood, we wrestle against principalities.” So those principalities are evil, those things, and they can jump on any individual. So when you start to hate an individual as opposed to the principality, that’s where we get confused.
— “Nick Cannon – 11/17/2016.” The Breakfast Club on Power 105.1FM


I’m not doing it to you, I’m doing it for me.
— “I Am a Storm.” Shameless


You want to destroy shit and you want to be rewarded for it.
— “I Am a Storm.” Shameless


Don’t run. Be the guy who has nothing to run from.
— “I Am a Storm” Shameless


“You Create Your Own Merit.”
— “Chapter 5/ Water.” 3%


“I thought because I loved you I had to show you the real me. “

— “Season 2/ Episode 5.” Humans


“[…] you’re stubborn as hell but generally not stupid.”

— “You Sold Me the Laundromat, Remember?” Shameless


“We don’t need love, me and you. We need like and desire.”

— “You Sold Me the Laundromat, Remember?” Shameless

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